my life is all i have

bein sensitive

2005-06-23T16:49:00.000-07:00

you should've seen the moon last night, it was the most beautiful thing i've never seen before but like most things beautiful it went away until the next time i see the most beautiful thing i've never seen before...........................thought that ol bullshit up after i took a B to the head by myself the other night and was looking at the moon, this broad i know said she liked it because she's into poetry. i think it's pretty gay, but whatever.

Somebody took a big crap on my heart

2005-02-16T12:11:00.000-08:00

That's a line from a movie, but basically what happened. Me and the chick I wrote about in my last post are finally done. Yeah, it took that long to figure out. After a few months of dating, having a great time and just fuckin chillin, it all ended saturday. Am I pissed? no, just a little salty because she was a sweet chick. I don't think I ever liked a chick as much as I liked her and god damn she was good in the sack. It's all good though...............Training has been going real well, I think my arm is almost normal again, and about a month or so ago I made it official that I quit the other sport that I play. My coach wants to talk shit? then fuck em. I run that shit. Can't wait to get back in school this fall. I've made it back to the campus a few times over the months and the ladies are looking lovely, seems like I'm missing out this year. I'm out.

I guess me and karma is even

2004-11-21T02:10:00.000-08:00

It's been a minute since I wrote anything and alot of shit has gone down: friend went to jail and another friend died. But on a better note, my rehab seems to be pretty successful so far (knock on wood) haven't had any pain as of yet........................ AND my head is being fucked with right now, i think. I met this girl about a month ago, super cool girl and hot and pretty wild in the sack. Anyway, the past few days have been pretty weird with her and I'm pretty sure she's starting the beginning stages of blowing me off which sucks because I was really starting to like her and I could've definitely seen her as being my girlfriend, but now she kind of quit calling me a little and we haven't been hangin out at all since the other day. So that's how I got the title of this blog "me and karma is even" When you fuck over someone, you get fucked over. See, I pretty much fucked over my ex girlfriend even though I told her we weren't getting back together, but I'm sure I did. But then again, this could all be in my head. Out beetches

I got the god father flow the don juan demarco, i swear to God don't get in fucked up

2004-11-19T01:26:00.000-08:00

WOW. I just wrote a bunch of shit and it didn't post, so I'll have to do it again.......................Alot of crazy shit has gone on the past 2 or so months that I haven't written: friend going to jail, had a friend die. It's been rough to say the least. But on a good note, my rehab has gone alot better than expected, no pain at all (knock on wood) I met a new girl too about a month ago. She's a super cool and hot chick and pretty wild in the sack. Shitty thing is, she's been acting really weird the past 2 days and I can just kind of tell that things are about to be over between us and that's really shitty, because i was starting to like her alot. We had some great times so it's pretty shitty that it's going to end like this. Better now than somewhere down the road though, you know? not really sure what happened. I guess it's sort of a good thing too, now I can focus more on rehabbing again. Not to say I've been half assing but sometimes a good refocusing is a good thing. Alright, I'm done crying about losing the first girl that let me put it where ever I want and yes, I did put it there. lol. That's not even what it was all about though, she had alot of great qualities, I can seriously say she was pretty close to being my perfect chick for the past month and it's a damn shame it's coming to an end.

Handle your business

2004-09-03T17:45:00.000-07:00

School just got done with it's full second week and it's pretty weird not being there. Stopped by a couple times before I got out of town to talk to my cool coach and watched a little practice. I couldn't stay long because it was making me sick not being out there with them. Fuckin' injuries. Still haven't had a normal conversation with my other coach yet, should be interesting when it happens. All I've been doing the past 2 weeks is rehabbing and it sucks pretty bad, I need to start finding other stuff to do during the day because my rehab work is usually done by 2 and then I sit around until a good 10 or 11 at night until I go out so I drive myself crazy all day............I've been talking to this one chick that I've known for a while and not real sure if she's interested so I'd hate to ask her out and have her shoot me down, so I just won't say anything until she does. That sounds like a plan. But wow, she's hot. Yes, I need to get some booty. LOL.........That's all I got for now beetches.

Chivalry IS dead and women killed it

2004-08-24T22:00:00.000-07:00

For some reason my newest post doesn't come up on the website, and it has a CLASSIC story so you have to go to the archives. I've come to a conclusion that nobody reads this shit which is completely ridiculous because I got shit to say. lol, just kidding. So if anybody reads this you should post a comment just to let me know..........Today was the first time in literally months that I didn't go out, I think I needed to stay in for the night. Still haven't talked to the chick from the story I told in the last post, should be a good conversation the next time we talk. I've decided in a recent discussion with my ex girlfriend that relationships are overrated. It's like you build up what you have and put all this time in for nothing and you don't get to hang out with your friends as much. I haven't thought this until the past day or so, but my ex girlfriend seriously wasted my time and now I'm pissed because I'm sure I missed out on some good times over the course of our relationship. So no more relationships for a long, long time. I'm just going to spend my extra time rehabbing myself from my injury. F*ck chicks............Like I said before, I stayed in tonight, but I was supposed to go out tonight, but my friend's buddy was going to go and he's a complete fag. He hits on every chick and it's actually pretty embarrassing so instead of telling my friend that his boy is a fag I just come up with a lame ass excuse to not hang out. But for real, when your me, you can't be around shit like that..........Pick up that Cormega, it's a hot pick up.

...When the smoke clears, do it again

2004-08-22T23:41:00.000-07:00

This is the first time in 3 weeks that I was actually allowed to log on here. Some ill shit has happened since the last time I wrote. Exactly 5 days after my last post, I hurt myself pretty badly in a game. I've been rehabbing my ass off for the last 2 1/2 weeks but doesn't seem to be working. So what does that mean? more than likely surgery. I've actually decided to not go to school this year because of it and both of my coaches in the sports I play are PISSED, but I'm not going to go to class all drugged up on pain killers, won't work like that. It will be very weird not being with my teammates that I've been with the past couple years, but sometimes you have to look out for yourself and this is something I need to do on my own. So I'm just going to take the year or semester off and rehab the shit out of myself. I'd much rather be in school then doing that, that's for sure. I've been fairly bummed out since that incident and haven't been doing much except for rehabbing and playing video games. I actually can't see myself going back to school but since I'm obviously not going to have the year that I need, I'll be back at it in a year..............So let me get this right, when a female says: "I never do anything like this" or "I'm normally not like this" and then add in a: "but I will this time because I really like you" means they say and do that all the time right? right. This happened to me last night. Turnoff, big time. After that comment was made I decided to leave the situation because nothing good could come from me scoring a chick like that. Well, it was either that or the huge vagina. And no, my mouth wasn't on it. Ish. Hey, it's cool if you gotta get yours, but shit, don't say you don't do it all the time when you know damn well you do. Would I have gone to her place if she told me she had sex with 30 dudes? HELL no. And don't say I didn't call her out on the huge vagina because I SURE DID. This cat's not really into STD's. But this was the situation, and no, I'm not bragging about how some chick wanted me, I just happen to think what I said to her was pretty funny. So this chick pulls her pants down and puts my hand on her crotch and my exact words were: "Damn girl, you got a big ass p*ssy" then she says: "Oh, it's all good, that's what happens when you sleep with a few guys" and I said "Hold up, I know what a chick that's been with a few guys feels like, so how many is a few?" This bitch said "Oh, about 30" so that right there means about 40. The last thing I said to her was "Well, gotta go" and I was seriously laughing through that whole conversation because this girl was an idiot and I've known her for a while so I didn't just meet her and I always thought she was normal................ 9am rehab session is going to come quick. later for you beetches

I left em backwards, they thought they farted when they sh*ted, cuz I am everything and everthing is me

2004-08-01T22:12:00.000-07:00

3 weeks 'til school starts, Not happy about that...........I'm HURTIN' today, I busted my ass this weekend working out and things like that. Had an alright weekend, Friday night kicked it with one of my boys. Haven't kicked it with him since classes got out in May. We went to this little club and was just checking out some females. It's cool every once in a while to go to a dance club just to see some scattered ass running around. But I hate going to a place and having people know who I am, not too many things worse than that, but I'll take some free drinks. Saturday night kicked it with some guys I've known for years. It's always cool hangin out with those two, because us three are clowns when we get together, but because of our schedules we don't get a chance to kick it too often..........My ex girlfriend has been bugging the shit out of me for the past week. I knew I shouldn't have let her give me head last week. I might have to cut off all communication with her, not sure what the fuck I was thinking about. Actually, I still need to cut off all contact with every chick I know and just start fresh, or be smart about it and just worry about playing sports. But what fun would that be? I'm a college athlete..........I hate when chicks somehow get my screen name and act like they know me and get pissed when I don't know who they are. That just happened so I decided to throw that in there............Still don't know how to start a new paragraph, and I still don't know if anybody even reads this garbage. Maybe if I threw my name out there? Just playin, that's not going to happen. But for real, nobody reads my shit? I might not be writing on this shit much longer...............The past few days I've been thinking alot about the friends I've had that have passed the last 4 years. It's over 10 people and it's rough sometimes still. But my friend that passed away this past winter has been the toughest to deal with I believe. It still doesn't seem right that he died and has been hard to except. I think about him often and always ask for his help during the sports that I play.

...Then they wanna doubt the kid

2004-07-28T10:52:00.000-07:00

Heard the most funniest, most ridiculous and nastiest story of all time, not going to go into too detail here, but wow won't be able to look at someone I know the same again, not too worried though. This chick I know called me last night, wasn't interested in talking to her. I hate when chicks I wouldn't bone call me. It's not that she's ugly or anything like that and she has huge jugs, but just something about her turns me off, maybe the fact that she's been around the block a few times. Yeah actually, that's it. There's somebody else I'd love to bone, but she's off limits. She doesn't have a boyfriend or anything like that, but definitely off limits.........Doesn't look like I'm going to be able to go home again before school starts, that blows but I was just there last month so that should get me by until next summer. Apparently you need money to travel. Although I have the money, I'm just not willing to spend it on that right now. Sounds bad, I know but it's really not.........So I decided when classes start, I'm not going to talk to any of the same chicks I talked to last year because they were boring as hell and they suck at life and are all psycho and that includes chick athletes. I don't care if we play sports at the same college NOT talkin to them. Ish. Got to hit the gym.

I'm like Godzilla stompin over Mt. Fiji

2004-07-25T23:11:00.000-07:00

Today was pretty boring. Decided to take the day off any kind of training. Hooked up with my brother and pops and went out to eat and saw Fahrenheit 9/11. I don't care about politics but Bush is a homo. Never really cared before, but he blows. Don't really like movies like that, but it turned out to be pretty good. I like comedies. Huge Will Ferrell, Dave Chappelle, Martin Lawrence fan. I'm also turning into a pretty big Vince Vaughn fan especially after Dodgeball. (until I figure out how to start a new paragraph this: "........." is going to be the sign for new paragraph. so...........Tonight was a little out of pocket. Ex called me tonight and we got in a big ass argument. Not sure why we still argue when we're not going out. Actually, not sure why I still talk to her. Anyway, turned out she wanted a few things back that I forgot I had. A couple shirts and things of that nature. Somehow we ended up pretty much brawling on the phone but we still ended up meeting and we argued some more. We stopped fighting, mainly because she started acting like a normal human being, and she started rubbing my leg then that turned into giving me head. Hey, I know it's my ex but what am I going to do say "Hey, don't give me head"? No, I'm going to get head. Afterwards she told me she would do that anytime I wanted her to even though not even an hour before she gave me head she was telling me she never wanted to see, or talk to me again so this is obviously a scam for me to hang out more or something. But yeah, if I'm not getting anything else, sure I'll call her once a week or so. Why not? For sure wouldn't mind some new shit though........After that I stopped at the local bar to see what was going on because I knew a few buddies were going to be there. This old guy I always bullshit with was in there for 13 hours drinking. He was hammered, could barely even talk to me. He was telling me how he's going to make a trip out to a few of my games this year. If he goes, I hope he goes drunk because man, he has me on the floor with some shit he says..........Really not excited for school to start, this summer went way too fast. Next thing I know I'm going to be knee deep in school work. Oh well, only 2 more years of this shit. Actually, maybe one more depending on how this year goes. I'd love for this to be my last year of school, I'd ditch school in a heartbeat if I have a good season. Play one sport, get paid, no schoolwork or play two sports, be broke and nothing but schoolwork? It's a easy choice in my book. 95% of athletes don't go to college to get a education, they go to play sports, just so happens you need to get a education in order to play. If people had the choice of just playing and no schoolwork, it would be a easy ass choice to make, especially if you have a chance of going pro. Don't get me wrong, people take scholarships to get education, but I guarantee you it's the bottom of the barrel players that know when college is over so is their sports careers. Everybody always wonders why people leave school early to turn pro and athletes act like it's a tough decision but it's really not, just a front they have to put up to make the college look good. The colleges keeps us broke, we can't do shit except play sports and alot of these guys come from poor families so what choice do you think they'd make? Obviously going to take the millions that's offered to them. But some guys do take chances and mess up everything. I know one guy that left school early and all he does now is hang out on the block. Was he good enough? Yes. Did he work hard enough? Hell no. In college your hand is held through your workouts in season and off season and you have no choice but to improve because your the school's robot. But if you think you can turn pro and you do it, you're on your own. If you decide for one second you can slack for a day or two, you're fucked, HARD and that's how you turn out like that guy. Because in the pro's if you slack for one second you just got passed by by alot of people. This just turned into your lesson on how 95% of college athletes feel. I'm out beetches. I just thought of something: DOES ANYBODY EVEN READ THIS SHIT?????????? wow.

I'm that Benz on 24's

2004-07-25T00:00:00.000-07:00

First off, I've never done anything like this, so I'm just going to try it for a few days and if I decide it's gay, then I'm going to stop. Second, I'm not going to say where I'm from or what my name is or any of the people I know because I'd be embarrassed as shit if anyone I know saw this. About me: Like the title says, I'm that Benz you see rollin' on 24's, white on white, license plate says "B.I.G." That's me, just rollin'. I'm not a BMW on 20's, I'm not a truck, I'm a Benz on 24's S55 version, faster then the v12. I'm well above average height, between 6'4" and 6'7" and weigh between 200 and 220 pounds. I'm a 2 sport athlete at my college with a decent chance of going pro in one of them. (It's true, no reason to bullshit here) Within the last 4 months I broke up with my girlfriend of almost a year, I thought she was hot, and she was but she was very insecure about herself. I honestly think something may have happened to her when she was younger, but I obviously wouldn't ask her about something like that. Jesus Christ, how do I start a new paragraph on this thing? So we broke up because I never felt she trusted me, but the funny thing is she says I never trusted her. WTF? The truth is, I didn't care what she did or where she went because like I said I'm that benz on 24's and nobody she could possibly meet would top me. But, back to the point. I got drilled with a billion questions everytime I ever went out with my friends and guilt tripped everytime I wanted to go out and unfortunately I started becoming unhappy with our relationship and she was a super cool chick. So I started thinking to myself: Why should I be unhappy? Why should I get drilled with a billion questions? Why should I get involved in stupid ass arguments all the time? Why should I go untrusted? I mean, if you lead my life would you want to have to go through all that? So even though I loved her and I still do, it had to end and I do miss her sometimes, especially on nights like tonight. Very boring night tonight by the way. She also didn't understand the commitment it takes to be a college athlete and that bothered me alot. In the almost year we went out, we only had sex 4 times. 4 times!!! When we were going out it didn't bother me at all but after we broke up and had talked about possibly getting back together that's all I could think about. Because shit, I'm a college athlete I should be getting crazy ass. But the funny thing is, I truly believe that some day far down the road, we'll get back together, that is if I don't end up with anybody else, but wow, she gave some great head. lol.......So, that leaves me with present time. School is coming up quick and I'm dreading it, bad. Since when do you have to take classes and do good in them to play sports? Who came up with that rule? lol. Just kidding, but not really. This summer has been pretty kick ass. Just chillin with my boys enjoying the night life. Mainly with 2 friends and to be honest, this is one of the best summer's I've had in a long time. Don't get me wrong, during the days, I'm busting my tail getting ready for my upcoming seasons. Definitely more excited for one sport than the other (the one I'm better at and have a chance of going pro in, obviously).......The last thing I'm going to talk about is why I'm not getting any ass and how bad I need some. I'm not the type of guy that's going to jump down every chicks throat that walks by. Every guy does that so I feel I need to do something different so I just make eye contact and smile and if they feel me, they talk to me. Weird thing is: every chick wanted me when I had a girlfriend, even if they didn't know me but now that I'm single, it just doesn't happen like that. That's how it always happens though, right? There's 4 or 5 chicks I could call at any time to bone, but why don't I call them? Basically because I don't like them. I knew all of them before I met my last girlfriend and I just don't like certain things about each one, enough to where I don't even want to call them after a night of partying but I still talk to all of them every once in a while just to keep them hanging on, but they just don't seem cool to me. Pretty shitty I know, but what are you gonna do? I need to find a cool chick that likes to bone. Man, I need some ass. I'm gone. Need sleepy. until next time beetches.